Persy -- The Crystal Cave by Mary Stewart

King Arthur and Merlin and all those chaps have been a part of legend ever since they actually existed, and it's practically a genre unto itself. Sometimes it focuses on Merlin, sometimes Arthur, sometimes Lancelot, sometimes Guinevere, sometimes someone completely random. But the Arthurian legends are still going strong today.

Sorry, we're studying Anglo-Norman literature in my English class right now, so I'm trying not to slip into essay mode. Focus.

Myrddin Emrys is the bastard son of Lady Niniane, daughter of the king of Britain in Maridunum. No one knows who his father is, for Niniane refuses to tell a single soul, even her father the king. It is widely believed that little Merlin (affectionately called so by his mother and others) is the son of the demon or the devil himself, for sometimes he knows things he shouldn't and has a tendency to overhear a great many things.

One day Merlin finds himself in a cave and encounters a wise old man named Galapas, who teaches Merlin many things. Not long after this, Merlin is forced to flee the castle and ends up crossing the sea to Cornwall and in the service of Ambrosius, outcast prince. With Merlin's often supernatural assistance, Ambrosius and his brother Uther just might be able to retake all of Britain and drive the hated Saxons out.

Okay, so that summary is a bit crap, but I'm not super good at all of the Saxons war Britain king stuff. I followed along fine while I was reading, but it's not exactly what stuck with me.

What did stick was all of Merlin's adventures and powers. I really like how Mary Stewart writes him, starting with his toddler years and gradually following him as he grows up. He's not an amazing sorcerer, but no one will believe him when he tells them. He actually is just very very intelligent and likes to learn about everything. True, he's prone to a few destinies and visions every now and again... but really, he's not a magician.

Normally I don't read a lot of epic fantasy or even Arthurian tales in general -- it's just never been my forté. Arty's usually the one who reads that stuff. So I entered The Crystal Cave without much excitement. But I actually really enjoyed the whole adventure. It's definitely an epic in the sense that it moves along slowly at its own pace, unhurried and in no rush to get to the action. There's a lot of description of the war and the tactics of Ambrosius, which makes sense because it concerns Merlin quite a lot. Mary Stewart has some very nice writing suited to the genre she's chosen, though if you like fast-paced fantasy adventure then this isn't the book for you.

What really kept me reading was Merlin himself. His personality is just great. He's very no-nonsense, a bit brash, but also extremely level-headed as he matures into a young man. He knows how to use his brains and his luck, and is extremely good at coming up with something in the moment. No one else likes him much, but in the age he lived in, he wasn't exactly the popular type. Personally, I'd love to hang out with him.

If you like historical epic fantasy and/or Arthurian legends, this is definitely the book for you. There are few more books in Mary Stewart's Arthurian Saga, and I look forward to reading those at some point. They just take a long time to get through because they're each over 500 pages. Not exactly light reading.

It feels great to be reviewing books again. Let's hope it lasts!

--Persy

You might like this if you: like historical epic fantasy; like Arthurian legends; like Arthurian retellings; like Merlin; like magic that's not actually magic but everyone insists is magic; like historical battle fantasy stuff; or if you sometimes have weird visions that cause all your friends to make the sign against evil and make everyone think your absent father is the devil.

Persy -- Starlighter by Bryan Davis

What's this?? A REVIEW??? Did anyone else know those ever happened here? Seriously, it's been like, two or three months. Sorry about that. My bad.

Jason's a young man living on the human world where few people still believe the stories of dragons and human slaves. But his brother is one of those few, determined to save the people who, a century ago, were captured by dragons and taken to another world as slaves. Jason himself isn't sure he believes the stories, but when his brother disappears in search of the lost ones, the quest is left up to him. But first he must rescue Elyssa from the dungeons and accept her strange, perceptive abilities...

Meanwhile, Koren lives as a dragon slave, prized for her red hair and green eyes and bewitching storytelling abilities. But what do the dragons really have in store for her? And is it true that they were enslaved against the will as the humans say, or did the dragons really rescue them from an even worse fate?

It's not a bad fantasy adventure. It's a relatively fast read, so it doesn't feel like you've wasted your life away reading it or anything. Honestly, it's just not good enough to spend a ton of time on. Aside from Arxad the dragon, all of the characters are very one-dimensional and flat. Don't get me wrong, plenty of them are likeable. I honestly love Randall and Tibalt, but they're still pretty flat, plus they're only secondary characters. Jason and Koren certainly aren't bad for main characters, in fact they're pretty cool themselves. And Elyssa's not awful or anything. But... they're all just pretty boring. The character interactions as well are just kind of... flat. 

The plot doesn't really make up for it, unfortunately. Lots of the adventure seemed pretty pointless, making the whole thing unnecessarily complicated. The whole mess with them falling down the bottomless pit and floating down the river and everything totally went over my head and I had no idea why any of it was happening. And then Elyssa's always coming up with "brilliant" schemes that seem totally pointless, like sending Jason out to die while she works on stopping the flood. Why didn't she just try to stop the flood first and then send out Jason? She's supposed to be super smart, but she just strikes me as kind of distracted.

If I were to sum up this book in two words, they would be "needlessly complicated." I think if it had been edited down a bit more it would've been really something, but as is it kind of reads like an early draft I wrote when I was twelve. Tons of twists and turns and delays and puzzles and not much else.

I will say that the Black Egg gives me genuine creeps. That part was extremely well done. When he's trying to convince Koren, I actually wasn't sure for a minute if the Black Egg was good or bad. And the fact that I was so unsure and on edge made it so much more interesting. It's honestly one of the few reasons I'm looking forward to finishing the book series.

--Persy

You might like this if you: like dragons; like Christian fantasy; like simple fantasy adventures; don't care about the characters; have time to kill; or if your ancestors were kidnapped by dragons.

Persy -- The Highlander's Touch by Karen Marie Moning

Here's the thing, Karen Marie Moning: you write a story in which time travel plays a significant part, and I'm GONNA be harsh.

This is actually the third book in Karen Marie Moning's historical romance Highlander series, but you don't have to read them in order, so don't worry about spoilers for other books. However, if you don't know the standard plot to a romance novel and/or don't mind discovering one or two minor plot surprises, you might not want to read this review.

Lisa Stone is working two jobs, struggling to support her cancer-ridden mother. Her father died long ago, and now she's all Catherine, her mother, has. She works as a night maid for a museum, and one night she happens upon a mysterious artifact and... well, touches it. She is instantly transported back in time to the Scottish highlands... where she comes face to face with Circenn Brodie, a deadly man who is a stickler for rules. But will his unquenchable love for Lisa cause him to break . . . every . . . single . . . rule?

Sorry, I get super dramatic when I review romance novels. Dunno why.

Let's start way back in the Prologue. Circenn curses a flask so that once it is touched it will be transported back to him, effectively returning the lost flask. Unfortunately, it will also return whoever touches the flask. Adam gets pissy and makes Circen swear to kill the bearer of the flask to protect all the secrets, or whatever. After a lot of arguing, Circenn makes the oath. But here's the thing: Circenn swears to kill the MAN who touches the flask. MAN. MALE. Guess who brings the flask? Right. A woman. I totally expected this to be the loophole. And it would've worked SO WELL because Adam knew who would pick up the flask, and Adam didn't actually want her dead, and even if Circenn forgot he said man, Adam could've been all, "Remember, you swore to kill the MAN. AHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA."

But that's not what happened. Oh well.

Moving on. I don't see what the big deal is about Circenn being immortal. I mean, yeah, I get not wanting to curse anyone else with immortality, but still. Do you have any idea how much trouble would've been saved by him just spilling the beans? "Oh, Lisa, your mother is going to die alone in the future? WAIT, I'm IMMORTAL. I promise to seek her out and take care of her. Heck, I'll even throw my sexy bod into the equation."

But that solution never occurred to anyone. Whatever.

Moving on. Perhaps this is a small detail, but it seriously bugs me. The longer Lisa spends in the past, the more upset she gets because every day she spends there is a day her mother is alone. But... she's not on another planet. She's in the past. So if she were to find some sort of way to time travel... she could just travel back to the moment she left.

But maybe I'm just being nitpicky about time travel.

But now that we're on the subject, the ending. Oh. my. gosh. the. ending. Romance novels are notorious for magical, happily ever afters, but THIS? SERIOUSLY? You are taking it TOO FAR, here! You can't just DO THAT.

There are also some absolutely random parts that I don't understand. There's the stereotypical best friend Ruby, who gets left behind in the modern day world. She has a total of two scenes, and afterwards she's sometimes referenced but never more than to explain away bits of knowledge or clothing that Lisa possesses. There is never any sign that Lisa misses her best friend. But this isn't a major issue.

What strikes me as REALLY odd is the redhead who snubs Duncan. I mean, what the crap? She and her brother hint at some malicious intent and there's the insinuation that they're even lying about their names. Moning goes into such detail about her appearance and the scene seems so dadgummed important... and then she disappears completely. Maybe it's a reference to another book in the series? I don't know. But it's just plain weird.

And my final irritation... the first time Circenn sees her in her undies, she says that he caught her in the one fancy pair of underpants she happens to own: a set of lacy lavender lingerie. The ONE pair she owns. But then at the very end, she rushes to get dressed and we find out later that she is now wearing a set of lacy PINK lingerie. What.

Oh wait. Of course. Of COURSE she'd have more lacy lingerie, because THEY CHANGED THE EFFING FUTURE. Naturally, that would result in her having more pairs of flirty underpants.

All that aside... I mean, the characters weren't bad. I guess. I didn't think the book was too awful until I started writing a review of it. Let's be honest, this isn't much of a review... more like a rant. But I can't think of anything so awe-inspiringly brilliant that it would make up for all of my little pet peeves that showed up in the book. I swear, when I was actually reading it, it wasn't awful.

But she messed with time travel. How can you expect me to not be harsh?

--Persy

You might like this if you: just really like historical romances; like time travel, but don't like it when it's complicated; have an afternoon to kill and don't want anything serious; or if you work as a night maid in a museum and wonder what would happen if you inspected all the artifacts yourself. That's right, bad stuff would happen. Don't do it.

Persy -- Perfect Chemistry by Simone Elkeles

Y'all should be proud. Because even though I just spent my first night in a college dormroom and I've been way too busy the past few weeks to read a reviewable novel... I'm bringing you an ontime review. Shazam.

 

All Brittany wants to do her senior year is maintain the perfect life others see: the clothes, the grades, the cheerleader, the boyfriend. What they don't know is that Brittany struggles to take care of her autistic sister and deal with her distant parents.

 

But her first day goes ominously bad. She accidentally amost runs over Alex Fuentes, the toughest guy in school, and then finds out she has to be his partner in chemistry. Yikes.

 

Meanwhile, Alex is just trying to take care of his brothers and his mom and protect them from the gangs by being in one of the gangs. But when a bet is placed over Brittany's virginity, his world gets a little more complicated...
 

I was expecting to either hate the book and quit within the first five chapters or find a surprising new favorite. I actually did neither. My first impression was that Simone Elkeles is trying pretty hard, and almost has really good writing. Instead, it's just pretty good. The best thing this book has going for it is that it's real easy to read quickly, so the 350 pages goes by in a breeze. If it didn't, I'm pretty sure I wouldn't have finished the novel. I'm not sure if this is supposed to be a r...more I was expecting to either hate the book and quit within the first five chapters or find a surprising new favorite. I did neither. My first impression was that Simone Elkeles is trying pretty hard, and almost has really good writing. Instead, it's just pretty good. The best thing this book has going for it is that it's real easy to read quickly, so the 350 pages goes by in a breeze. If it didn't, I'm pretty sure I wouldn't have finished the novel. I'm not sure if this is supposed to be a retelling of Romeo and Juliet or not, but it basically is. So I might consider excusing the stupidity and hopelessness of Brittany, the heroine. She's kinda... boring and... silly and... impetuous, in a weird kind of way. I'm honestly not sure what her personality is supposed to be. Alex is a little better, but he's also very dramatic and I can't see why he's so in love with Brittany.   I personally like Alex and Shelley, but whatever.   And then Mrs. Peterson is really cool. In fact, she's probably my favorite character. But whatever.   Y'know what's really silly? The epilogue. I mean, I guess it's kind of cute in a weird kind of way, but it's also just... silly. Sorry.   Overall it's not a bad book, but I certainly wouldn't reread it and I don't think I'm even going to continue the series (the second book is about Alex's little brother and the love he finds in an unexpected place!).   --Persy   You might like this if you: like shallow romance; like Romeo and Juliet; like high school romance; like forbidden romance; or if you yourself are shallow, in high school, and are involved in a forbidden romance.



Arty -- The Selection by Kiera Cass

Friends, readers, countrymen - I bring you a YA dystopian romance that doesn't completely suck.

I know, I know, le gasp.  This is not to say "GO OUT AND BUY THE SELECTION RIGHT NOW CUZ AWESOME!!!1!!" YMMV and I recommend a library read before committing.

But seriously guys.  AMERICA.  AND MAXON.  AND MARLEE.  THESE CHARACTERS.

Have a Goodreads summary:

For thirty-five girls, the Selection is the chance of a lifetime.  The opportunity to escape the life laid out for them since birth.  To be swept up in a world of glittering gowns and priceless jewels.  To live in a palace and compete for the heart of gorgeous Prince Maxon.

But for America Singer, being Selected is a nightmare.  It means turning her back on her secret love with Aspen, who is a caste below her.  Leaving her home to enter a fierce competition for a crown she doesn't want.  Living in a palace that is constantly threatened by violent rebel attacks.

Then America meets Prince Maxon.  Gradually, she starts to question all the plans she's made for herself - and realizes that the life she's always dreamed of may not compare to a future she never imagined.

I don't actually know what's up with that last paragraph, because... there's nothing much like that in the book at all.  Maybe it's a series overview, I dunno.  But it makes America sound all dramatic when she's such a down-to-earth kind of person.

America is what made the book for me, mostly.  She has her Weepy Sensitive Heroine moments, and she can jump to some pretty drastic conclusions without a lot of evidence, but for the most part, she's a really friendly girl.  Her character is pretty consistent, and along with lovely consistency is likeableness.  It's really pretty dang fantastic.  The only thing that annoyed me was the constant "Oh boohoo I'm not pretty" when basically everyone else told her she was - why that needs to be a thing, I have no idea.

Also, MAXON.  Maxon is a sweetheart.  I don't think Cass was really comfortable writing him at first - he came on kind of stiff, and not just the kind of stiff she was going for - but as it went on, he became a teddy bear.  Impulsive and naive, but a teddy bear.  And, before the inevitable Love Triangle of Wangst broke in, he and America had the most. adorable. friendship.  YOU MEAN BOYS CAN BE FRIENDS WITH GIRLS WITHOUT THERE BEING ROMANTIC INTEREST AT FIRST SIGHT?

(We don't talk about Aspen.  Aspen is a testosterone-fueled child who needs to grow up a few years before getting into a serious romantic relationship.  Go away, Aspen, no one likes you.)

Plotwise, the Selection competition - thirty-five girls being gradually whittled away until Maxon chooses his bride - isn't as fierce as the blurb makes it out to be.  Only a few of the girls turn out to be conniving witches; it's even mentioned, a couple times at least, that the majority of the girls are close and don't want to intentionally sabotage the others' chances.  I liked that, since most YA likes to depict large crowds of girls evil queen bees with a few honored exceptions (aka, the protag and her one/two friends).  Maybe it made the plot less intense, but it was unexpected and there wasn't an overload of the author trying to come up with a load of different ways to tell us "MOST OF THESE GIRLS ARE EVIL."

The rebellion groups - nice, realistic touch, there being more than one rebellion group - weren't very intimidating except for one scene, mostly because the worldbuilding in The Selection is the very weakest part of this book. (It tends to be, I've noticed, in most new YA dystopian romance.)  There is the mystery of one group (I can't remember whether it was the Southern or the Northern group) trying to get inside the castle to steal something, but it was hardly a major plot point.

I can't talk about this book without going into massive hysteria about the last chapter, which should be entitled "In Which America does what Every Female in the Typical YA Love Triangle should Do but usually Doesn't."  No spoilers other than that, but it just made me really, really happy and put me firmly in the court of Team America.

Weak and cheesy writing - on an infrequent but consistent basis.  Not really that much conflict - yes.  Almost total lack of worldbuilding - yeah.  However, The Selection has a great MC, a great prince/friend/love interest, and genuine hope for an even more awesome sequel.  Definitely a recommend!

Persy -- The Passage by Justin Cronin

Are you ready for my round of excuses? Well, I was out of the country for almost a month, and then I got the chickenpox...

 

Science is cruising along, forever searching for the equivalent of the fountain of youth. Someone thinks they've found it... but is it what they think it is? Meanwhile, a young girl named Amy is abandoned to a group of nuns, and then kidnapped by the government. She becomes part of the experiments and while the world falls to ruins around her, she remains... Amy. And something a little bit more.

 

Almost a hundred years later, the story takes up with the small community of survivors who live inside a walled city with electric lights that will eventually shut off for good. And once that happens, no one will be able to stop the "smokes" from getting in and killing everyone.

 

The smokes are what happened when they tried spreading their fountain of youth. They got youth all right, but also a lot more. Superhuman abilities and a dose of insanity, and insatiable thirst and hunger for blood...

 

The little community's fragile peace is disturbed when Peter Jaxon runs into a Walker outside of the wall, a young girl who cannot speak with her mouth but somehow communicates exactly what she needs to say. No one knows where she came from, but it doesn't take Michael long to find the chip in her neck, put their years ago by the military. And it doesn't take him much longer to find a signal being sent out for her, asking for her return.

 

As the little community crumbles and the infected breach the walls, Peter leaves with a small crew to find the source of the signal, and, just maybe, other survivors.

 

This book took me over four months to read. That is a freaking long time. Geez. Admittedly, part of the problem was just crazy life stuff, but still. I mean, thinking about all the other things that have happened in the last four months, it's ridiculous to think that I've been reading the same book the whole freaking time.

 

Anyway. All that said, it makes it rather remarkable that I didn't just give up on the stupid thing. For some reason, I just kept on reading, kept re-checking it out at the library.

 

The beginning really drew me in, but the sudden drastic setting change really disoriented me, and for a long time I was really irritated about it. It took me a very long time to warm up to the new characters in the new setting. And once I had started to like them, Justin Cronin goes off and kills one of them and then has the other go through such a drastic character growth that he's not even the same character anymore. I'm still a little pissed off about that.

 

Two of the characters, Peter and Sara, really do have nice character growth. Peter was just "meh" in the beginning, but by the end he was awesome. Sara was "meeeeeeeh" and then she was "DON'T DIE, SARA." Theo and Maus, however, are just dull the whole way through.

 

The ending, OH THE ENDING. It was so sharp, so sudden, so unexpected, so... AAAUGH. It's amazing. I had to reread it five times to make sure I'd understood it correctly. Geez. Man. Wow. Golly what an ending. Major points for that one.

 

Justin Cronin has a very insensitive writing style. It's rather dry and there's not a whole lot of emotion in his characters (other than the occasional maniacal rage). It's not like I want an epic love story or anything, but something might be nice. Instead, you've got nothing. And then when he does put a bit of emotion in, it feels weird and...alien. Maybe he was just trying to sum up the world he created, but I don't really like it.

 

All in all it's... weird. The story and characters and writing is all just... weird. And long. Man. I would honestly only recommend this book to people who specifically like ridiculously long books. I don't think anyone else could get through it.

 

I also discovered that there's a sequel, and I'm not sure if I want to put my time and strength into that...

 

--Persy

 

You might like this if you: love ridiculously long novels; like horror vampire stories; like apocalyptic stories; don't much care about emotion (except for maniacal rage); or if you're dreaming about a mean fat woman and have an imaginary friend named Babcock.

Persy -- Wizard's First Rule by Terry Goodkind

Richard Cypher leads a simple life as a woodsman-guide-trailblazer-whatever person. Until the day a beautiful young woman named Kahlan shows up in his forest, bringing with her a boatload of trouble.

 

Secrets are unveiled. Richard discovers that he has a destiny as the Seeker, and he is given the Sword of Truth. It is now his job to defeat the evil tyrant Darken Rahl who has taken over Kahlan's homeland, and will soon move on to Richard's. He is accompanied by Kahlan and the old cloud reader Zedd.

 

You'd think there'd be more to say about an 800-page novel, but there really isn't.

 

If you've had to be around me over Christmas break, you'll know that Wizard's First Rule is a bit infamous. It took stinking forever to read. Oh my gosh, the only reason I was so determined to finish it was so that I could say I had read the whole darn thing and so I could write a legitimate review of it. Although let's face it, this will probably be more of a rant. Sorry.

 

The writing is dull. Oh my gosh it's dull. Terry Goodkind maybe could've gotten away with it four a 200-page book, but not an epic fantasy. Oh my GOSH. And the characters? So flat. Uuuuuugh flatness and dullness married and produced THIS.

 

Terry Goodkind also seems to have some kind of fascination with gore. There are random fightscenes that are basically excuses for him to talk about entrails and guts spewing across the floor in pools of blood. Basically.

 

The only enjoyable things in this entire book are Zedd and Denna and Scarlet. In fact, the thing that makes this book a real pain is Kahlan. If she weren't in the book, the whole thing might be tolerable. Near the end, there are sections with just Richard and Denna or just Richard and Scarlet, and I actually really enjoyed those parts. But then Kahlan would come back, and it would all go downhill into drama. The parts with Zedd, Denna, and Scarlet are not worth it.

 

This review's a little...well, lackluster. But let's just say I'm out of practice (haven't written a review in a loooong time) and I read this book a long time ago and don't really want to delve back into it even if it's just to refresh my memory. Yikesies.

 

--Persy

ps. I'm thinking Arty and I may have to have a Book Arena about Wicked Lovely, because I actually like that book.

 

You might like this if you: enjoy dull, flat, long, epic fantasy novels; like to make fun of things and need something new to make fun of; have a fondness for dramatic whiny heroines trapped in forbidden love; or if you have a dark secret, meet a strange woman in a forest, AND know a strange cloud-reader.

Arty -- Wicked Lovely by Melissa Marr

Let's get the new year (or the closest chronological thing to it) of reviews started off with a bang - in other words, a rant!

Aislinn (don't ask me how to pronounce it - I'm not proficient in Irish or Celtic or Gaelic or whatever it is pronunciation - I'm guessing like Ashlyn because her nickname is Ash) has the Sight - in other words, she can see faeries.  She pretends she doesn't see them because they don't know she can, and she doesn't want them or other humans to know of her ability.  But poor Aislinn is tormented by this knowledge and her entire existence seems to be one of victimization and misery at hiding her true self.

But hark!  A hot faerie approaches!  Seriously, he is hot - he's Keenan, the faerie Summer King.  And he thinks Aislinn is destined to be his Summer Queen.  Because of a 'feeling' and 'dreams' that have apparently gotten a lot of other girls kicked out in the cold - in other words, reduced to miserable Winter Girls, each successive Winter Girl having the duty of warning Keenan's next victim not to trust him.

Cue a tug-of-war between Aislinn, Keenan, Donia (the current Winter Girl who's still in love with Keenan), and Berea (I think her name is Berea), Keenan's mother and the current wicked Winter Queen.  It's not as dramatic as it sounds - mostly it's just Aislinn running away and being blah and hiding out at totally-not-her-boyfriend Seth's house.  And Keenan moping.  And Donia moping.  And Berea plotting.

I do have to say that it started out really good.  I was interested.  I was hopeful for something more interesting than your typical YA paranormal romance.  Seth, despite being in high school, lives alone, drinks tea, has tons of piercings, and keeps a boa constrictor.  He was cool at first.  Original.  Aislinn was moderately interesting and not too whiny.  Donia and Keenan had good personalities.

At first.

Oh good story of faeries and intrigue and Court angst.  You disappeared into a pile of teen angst, shaky characterization, and an exponentially growing number of wearisome plot devices.

The characters started to dissolve about a third of the way through.  There's a feeling you get when you have a firm grasp on a character, who they are and how they work.  None of the characters ever got that feeling - or, if they had it, it was for a few short chapters and then they lost it.  The only character who was halfway consistent was Berea, and that was because she was a cackling villainess who was there to hurt people and enjoy doing it for no particular reason.

There was one plot twist that I didn't see coming and that I appreciated - it would give away major spoilers if I wrote it out, but let's just say Marr didn't fall into the tired old love triangle bit, at least not fully.  It was just that by the time came to unleash the plot twist, I just didn't give a rip.  Everyone was boring.  Not unlikeable, per se, but just... blah.  Who cares that some faerie-human lady loves some faerie dude who wants some human girl who loves some mortal guy and they're all trying to be killed by some evil faerie queen?  Marr gave me no reason to care.

The prose was nice, there were regular sprinklings of originality, and the cover is absolutely gorgeous, but there's just not enough good here to warrant a recommendation.  In the end, the execution of the story is just as bland as the cover is beautiful.

Persy -- I Want My Hat Back/This Is Not My Hat by Jon Klassen

So...I haven't really read much since my last review. Which is saying something, because my last review was over a month ago. Yikes. So I'm resorting to something I've never done before: I am reviewing a children's book. This review will probably be longer than the book itself. Oh well.

 

So normally when I write a review, I head over to GoodReads to look at the short reviews I post there, to refresh my memory a little about the book. When I went back to look at what I'd written for I Want My Hat Back, written and illustrated by Jon Klassen, this is what I found:

 

"Awesomeness. Pure awesomeness."

 

Never have I spoken (written) truer words.

 

I Want My Hat Back follows the life of a bear(? There has been some disagreement over the species of the main character) who has lost his hat. And now he is going to find it.

 

It's as simple as that, really. But how do I relay the awesomeness and fantasticity of this short little book? I don't believe it is possible. The only thing you can do is read it. It's not like it'll take you very long.

 

Jon Klassen recently released the sequel, This Is Not My Hat. This little book follows a fish, who has...acquired...a hat. He quite likes his hat, and is determined to keep it. But someone has a different idea...

 

While its awesomeness is not as pure as I Want My Hat Back's, This Is Not My Hat is still pretty dang awesome. Pretty. dang. awesome.

 

This is the best review I've ever written. There's no need to tell me.

 

All I can say is that I'm struggling my way through an 800-page book with atrocious writing, and for some stupid reason I'm determined to finish it. I still have about 400 more pages, but I'm hoping to finish it at some point... hopefully within two weeks, and then I'll review an actual novel. Maybe.

 

--Persy

 

You might like this if you: like hats; like bears; like fish; like catching thieves; like thievery; or if YOU ARE AWESOME.

Arty -- Cinder by Marissa Meyer

I am so late again.  I apologize. 

Cinder.  Another one of those 'you have to read it, it's so good' books I keep hearing about. 

And you have to admit, the idea is pretty awesome.  A cyborg Cinderella in futuristic Beijing (New Beijing, to be precise)?  Definitely cool.  But surely such a great idea that was popular to boot couldn't be that good.

It could.

Here's the synopsis from Goodreads:

Cinder, a gifted mechanic, is a cyborg.  She's a second-class citizen with a mysterious past, reviled by her stepmother and blamed for her stepsister's illness.  But when her life becomes intertwined with the handsome Prince Kai's, she suddenly finds herself at the center of an intergalactic struggle, and a forbidden attraction.  Caught between duty and freedom, loyalty and betrayal, she must uncover secrets about her past in order to protect her world's future.

I'm going to start with the best and most impressive thing: the book wasn't about Cinder and Kai.  It was about Cinder.

It was about Cinder being a mechanic, and about Cinder's different relationships with her family (unfriendly with her stepmother and older stepsister, loving to her younger stepsister, Peony), and about Cinder trying to make sense of what she's found herself in, and about Cinder trying to help Kai, and then, sparsely, about Cinder falling in love with Kai.

It's about Cinder and how she works (no pun on the cyborg nature), not about Cinder falling in love with her Prince Charming.  It's ridiculously refreshing.

Kai and the other characters were well fleshed-out, too.  I actually love Kai.  Not a fangirl, ooh-I-love-him-so-much kind of love, but he's a really cool character with his own identity apart from Cinder, too.  His balance of insecurity and intelligence was interesting to watch. 

Queen Levana was a sincerely creepy villainess.  I mean... really creepy.  The whole idea of her - I won't spoil it - and of the Lunar race is oddly believable and at the same time just really creepy.  Which made a few of the plot twists even more horrible.

Meyer has a great writing style - very crisp and precise, not flowery or overdone or very fairytale-ish at all.  It actually felt a lot like Cinder - a brilliant mechanic, picking exactly the right words for exactly the right effect.  It wasn't a pretty style, like - say - Markus Zusak or Diana Wynne Jones - but it really worked.

Oh.  And the way she incorporated the Cinderella story details into this was just brilliant.  The car, and her baby cyborg foot, and the missing slipper... brilliant.  Did I say brilliant?

The cons of Cinder... there aren't many.

The afore-mentioned plot twists were... sort of predictable.  I don't try to figure out anything ahead of time, usually, but this time it was easy to see where Meyer was going.  Not all the time, but on a few of the key points.  Though I hate to say it, Cinder's and Kai's relationship does sometimes smack of insta-love.  (But love is rarely the focal point of their dealings with each other and it's overall more tastefully handled than in most cases.)  And it ends on a dreadful cliffhanger, and the next book, Scarlet, doesn't come out 'til February.

Small complaints from me.  In my humble opinion, it's a must-read for fans of fairytale retellings, sci-fi lite, or even just really well characterized YA.

Persy -- The Forest of Hands and Teeth by Carrie Ryan

Life is acceptable.

 

Sure, things aren't great. Mary's father is gone, her mother sits by the gate staring into the Forest of Hands and Teeth waiting for some sign of her husband, and her childhood friend Harry is getting a bit too close. But the Unconsecrated are still safely beyond the gate, and the villagers are surviving. Mary still tells herself the stories of her mother, stories of a time before the Unconsecrated and a neverending ocean.

 

But then Mary's mother does see her husband -- and gets too close. She is infected in an instant, and condemned to death. By the time Mary's brother Jed gets back, it's too late to say goodbye. Their mother is shoved outside the gate to join the rest of the Unconsecrated.

 

Life is hard.

 

Now orphaned, Mary expects to be taken in by her brother Jed and his wife Beth, but Jed stonily tells her that she is to be taken in by the Sisterhood, the religious women who rule the village. Harry doesn't come through on his interrupted proposal, and, with nowhere else to go, Mary is forced into the Sisterhood, where her world starts to turn upside down.

 

First of all, Travis, Harry's brother, is injured and taken to the Cathedral to be looked after. Mary has always been in love with him, and she now finds it harder than ever to give up on him (he's engaged to Cass, Mary's best friend) when she sees him every night.

 

And, to top it all off, Mary discovers the impossible: a stranger has come from outside the fence. Does this mean that they are not the last survivors of humanity? That there is an end to the Unconsecrated and the Forest of Hands and Teeth? That her mother's stories weren't just nonsense, but true? Is there really an ocean out there, as she's always dreamed?

 

Life is unacceptable.

 

Mary begins to unwind the lies and mysteries surrounding the Sisterhood and the limping little village. But before she can get very far, the unthinkable happens: the gates are breached, and the Unconsecrated flood the village. Mary only barely survives along with Harry, Travis, Jed, Beth, Cass, a little boy named Jacob, and Mary's dog Argos. The group escape the village and start along one of the many fenced paths leading into the Forest. Mary is confident that there is something waiting for them, something better. Something free. The ocean.

 

I had mixed feelings about The Forest of Hands and Teeth. I've also been rather oblivious about it. When it first came out, I declared it uninteresting and so didn't put it very high on my to-read list. And then when I finally picked it up the other day, I realized it was about zombies. ILOVEZOMBIES. Buuuut then I saw some of the tags it had on various book websites: die-heroine-die, stupid-love-triangle... you get the picture. My excitement faded.

 

Ten pages in: dull dull dull dull Mary is such a stupid whinypants.

Ten - thirty pages in: hey, this is pretty good.

Thirty - one hundred pages in: ugh, Mary.

One hundred - end of book: AAAAAAAAAAAGH.

 

This is one of those books with terrible chars. They're all stupid in their own special way, and I can't help but wonder if they all had some actual mental problems. But then again, seeing as how they live in a post-apocalyptic zombie world, I'll cut them some slack. I doubt I'd have all my lightbulbs screwed in just right if I were in their situation.

 

But this is also one of those books that is just so tragic and well-written and realistic that it somehow ends up beautiful in my head. I closed the book with a sense of awe and shock, completely exhausted from the trip. Talk about a climax done zombie-style. I even sort of ended up liking Mary towards the end. She's still not exactly smart, but I can see her being awesome in a kind of Resident Evil-one-woman-against-the-zombie-horde way.

 

This review reminding you of another book? Life As We Knew It, for example? Yeah, the books are ridiculously similar. They both follow the basic plot of an apocalypse with a character who is incredibly dull and yet resourceful. None of the main chars are all that interesting (though "Forest" had the advantage of a dog; I'll put you out of your misery and give you a small spoiler: Argos survives the entire book), but the writing is spectacular, and for the last half of the book, it's impossible to stop reading. Both books are the first in a series, and both sequels are about different characters. Both main characters are female with names beginning with M. If Carrie Ryan and Susan Beth Pfeffer aren't already friends, they should definitely get together and see what other tragedies they can come up with. Can you imagine what would happen if they wrote a book together?

 

"Forest" definitely isn't for everyone. I don't expect it to become the next great classic or anything, but I still encourage you to give it a try, as long as you aren't too incensed by stupid main chars or too sensitive to mental and physical pain. Yikesies.

 

You might like this if you: like Life As We Knew It by Susan Beth Pfeffer; like apocalypse/futuristic stories; love zombies and therefore must read/see/listen to anything related to zombies; enjoy amazing, unique writing styles (if you can call it unique... let's just say Pfeffer and Ryan are the only two with it); or if you feel like your life is not enough and that there's something else waiting for you beyond a deadly forest. Perhaps this book can give you examples of the does and don'ts (DO practice archery. DON'T be indecisive about your one true love).

Persy -- Eye of the Crow by Shane Peacock

Sherlock Holmes is a 13-year-old Jewish misfit who doesn't go to school and reads police newspapers for fun. He never interferes with investigations, but follows them closely, all the while solving little mysteries around his household and surrounding neighborhood. But when random chance implicates Sherlock as the accomplice to a violent murder, he has no choice but to go into hiding and attempt to clear his name. But first, he must escape from prison...

 

I'm not quite sure why, but I was expecting this to be some kind of retelling of Sherlock Holmes, in which Sherlock is a young boy in modern day London or something like that. I have no idea where I got that idea, because that's not what this series is. This really is about Sherlock as a kid before his master detective years.

 

First of all, everyone should know better than to meddle with Sherlock's past. That's part of the fun and mystery of Sherlock -- you know nothing about him. If you start trying to fabricate mysteries and adventures and details, it just starts to feel a little... meh.

 

But the funny thing is, Eye of the Crow is actually a pretty good mystery/adventure/historical book, but I really really wish it wasn't about Sherlock Holmes. If it wasn't about him, I'd look on the series with a much fonder eye.

 

I'm also not sure if this is some kind of precursor to the original Sherlock Holmes, or if Shane Peacock is retelling basic Sherlock Holmes stories. Because there's an Irene in this book (though her name isn't Irene Adler and she's not a thief or anything), and I would find it curious to name her that if it wasn't supposed to mean something. There's also the leader of a street gang, The Malefactor, who is something like Moriarty. The only thing I can figure is that maybe these characters turn into Irene Adler and Moriarty. Or perhaps it's just a big coincidence.

 

The writing isn't bad, and the plot's okay, and the mystery bit is pretty well done. Nothing about this book screams greatness, and when you add in that it's supposed to be Sherlock Holmes, it turns out to just be a meh-y book. Unfortunately, I'm required to review books four and six, so I'm going to have to continue through the whole series.

 

--Persy

 

You might like this if you: love Sherlock Holmes, and feel obligated to read every version of him you can find; like quick, easy mystery reads that don't require too much energy; like historical fiction; or if you like historical mysteries and don't care a whit about Sherlock Holmes.

Persy -- Born of Shadows by Sherrilyn Kenyon

That awkward moment when you haven't read anything since the last book you reviewed...

 

I considered trying to do something clever to get out of writing a review, like declaring today a new literary holiday that required an extra special post or something like that, buuuuut... I'm too tired to be clever, so I figured I'd just continue my little Sherrilyn Kenyon series by reviewing book four in the League series, Born of Shadows. You can read my reviews of the first three books here: "Night", "Fire", "Ice".

 

Caillen Dagan is a master smuggler struggling to survive and keep his three sisters out of trouble. He's managed quite well so far, but finally Kasen gets him in the deepest water ever, and he is captured and sentenced for execution. But before the axe can drop, his DNA test sends up red flags and before he knows it, he's declared the long lost heir to the Garvon and Exeter systems, and the only son of Emperor Evzen.

 

As if adjusting to his newfound royalty wasn't bad enough, he runs into Desideria, the daughter of the Quillac queen. The duo fall right into the trap of a mystery criminal and are accused of crimes that not even Caillen's committed. They have no choice but to rely on each other as they try to stop the true criminal before Caillen's father and Desideria's mother are assassinated.

 

What I like about "Shadows" is that the plot is a bit deeper and the romance a little less important. Don't get me wrong, it's definitely still around, but it's a bit less lustful and sudden than the romance in the previous three books. Caillen and Desideria spend more time getting to know each other than making out.

 

This book also introduces Fain Hauk, brother of Dancer Hauk who has appeared in several of the other League books. Fain is a bit less empathetic, a bit more sarcastic, and a lot more interesting than his younger brother, especially when you add in the whole space pirate thing. I think Hauk's getting his own book pretty soon, but I'm still holding out for Fain to get the spotlight.

 

As for the main characters, Caillen's pretty cool. I've always liked him, so getting a book all about him is nice. Desideria's not bad either, though a little... naive, perhaps. But that's kind of a requirement for heroines in Kenyon novels.

 

The plot is far more complex than the other League books, with lots of space politics. Kenyon doesn't try to put too much science in it either, which is good since I don't think she bothers to check if she's right when she does. It's a nice balance, but the ending kind of stumbles along to a happily ever after (which is also a requirement for Kenyon novels). It's a very forced happily ever after, but I guess perfection is too much to ask from a romance novel.

 

Sometimes it's hard to classify the League series as science fiction. Sigh.

 

"Shadows" is definitely better than "Ice", which was a bit of a flop in all areas, but for me at least, it doesn't hold quite as much appeal as the first couple of League books. Perhaps the plot is just getting old. Ah, well, no book infatuation lasts forever. Except for The Boxcar Children. And Harry Potter. And The Prophecy of the Stones. Maybe I should just stop there.

 

--Persy

 

You might like this if you: like romance, but not too much; like science fiction, but not too much; have already read the other League novels and are thirsty for more; need a quick guilty pleasure read; or if you suddenly discover you're a long-lost prince and you don't know what to do with yourself.

Persy -- Born of Ice by Sherrilyn Kenyon

You may remember my reviews of the first two books in Sherrilyn Kenyon's League series: Born of Night and Born of Fire. You may remember how much I love these books. I mean, it's not like I rave about them all the time or anything.

Unfortunately, book #3, Born of Ice doesn't quite live up to the first two books. Sure, the more you read any Kenyon books and the less amazing they are, but even the first time through, "Ice" wasn't overly impressive. But I still love it.

Devyn Kell is the son of Shahara and Syn (see Born of Fire), and a runner (similar to a smuggler, but not quite). He used to work as a army medic, but effectively "resigned" when he turned against his own unit in order to save a ten-year-old boy (Omari, who becomes Devyn's adopted son). And then there's Devyn's ex-fiancée, who mortally injured Devyn years ago, leaving him with a dangerous heart condition.

Alix is a slave. After her father/owner dies, a man named Merjack gets a hold of her and decides to use her to get back at Devyn's family. Y'see, Alix bears a startling resemblance to Devyn's ex-fiancée. So Alix joins Devyn's crew as the engineer. Even in the beginning, she doesn't want to take down Devyn, but it becomes harder and harder as she falls deeper and deeper... IN LOVE!!!

I'm going to go right out and say it. Devyn and Alix are both pretty stupid. I don't really care about either of them. And let's face it: the plot of "Ice" is pretty basic too, and not at all interesting. I get the feeling Kenyon didn't spend a lot of time editing this book, because it just isn't too awesome compared to the other books in the series.

And don't get me started on Kenyon's all time favorite line. "And in that instant, she/he knew insert-obvious-fact-of-life-here." She used it a few times in her other books, but she really goes overboard in "Ice". It gets a leetle ridiculous.

It would also be very confusing for people who haven't read books #1, #2, and #4 (possibly #5, but I haven't read that yet, so I don't know if it makes things clearer or not). It seems like every single character ever named in the League series had about fifteen children, and they're all in Born of Ice. It gets very hard to keep track of them.

The only things that save this book are Vik and Omari. Vik first appeared in "Fire", and he's only gotten better since then. I have a soft spot for snarky robots. And then Omari is just cute.

So...basically it's not a very well-written book. But! The first time through is as captivating as ever, and I mean... VIK!! He makes it all okay.

By the way, we're over halfway into RAMFAP month...how are y'all doing? Better than I am, I hope... That's all I'm gonna say.

--Persy

You might like this if you: like dramatic romances with stupid main characters; improbably spaceship chase scenes; tortured characters; or just the other books in Sherrilyn Kenyon's League series.

Persy -- Cast In Shadow by Michelle Sagara

Kaylin Neya has a past (don't we all?). But she's trying to forget it. Now, she tells herself, she is a Hawk, serving the land of Elantra. Hawks are the eyes and ears of Elantra, serving to maintain the peace along with the Swords and Wolves (it's complicated, I think... that or just badly explained in the book). But it's hard to escape your past when you've got strange powers that don't go along with anything the Mages understand, and when your arms are covered in strange markings.

It's also hard when the nightmare from your past appears, and you're supposed to work alongside him. And a Dragon. Yeah.

Okay, so it's hard to sum up this book with a dramatic, realistic tone, so let's try it this way: Kaylin grew up in the Fiefs, a basically lawless group of lands each ruled by a Fieflord. There, mysterious and terrifying killings began, and all the victims had the same markings as Kaylin. But when she was thirteen, she managed to escape into Elantra, where she began serving the empire by becoming a Hawk.

But then one day, she is assigned a new mission by the Hawklord to go back to the Nightshade, the fief where she grew up, to investigate the reappearance of the murders of marked children. And her two partners are Severn, the boy she grew up with in the Nightshade (who did something REALLY BAD, but we don't get to know what that was until halfway through the book, so I won't say anything), and Lord Tiamaris, a member of the Dragon Caste (they aren't fully explained until later in the book either, so... no spoilers). Supposedly, both Severn and Tiamaris have become Hawks, but Severn might as well be a criminal, and Dragons never become Hawks.

Hijinks ensue. Yeehaw.

Okay, I sound sarcastic, but I actually did enjoy Cast In Shadow. Well, mostly. I would've enjoyed it if the writing was...better. It felt very much like a rough draft, like it could've been amazing if Michelle Sagara had just gone over it a few times. There were random sentences in there that were probably put in for poeticness, but they just made things confusing and cluttered. On the other hand, most of the writing was un-cluttered. There wasn't nearly enough description, and I had to fill in most of the gaps with my imagination and hope I was close to the truth.

For instance... how the heck do they get from Elantra to the Fiefs? Everytime they'd go it seemed like they just walked over and it took about five minutes. If the Fiefs are lawless and so hard for the Dragon Emperor (who I think rules Elantra? It was hard to tell) to control, then shouldn't they be a little farther away than NEXT DOOR?

There's also a lot of chitchat, which seems to be how most of the explaining is done. Oftentimes, I couldn't tell who was speaking, either.

The characters are pretty cool though, for the most part. Lord Tiamaris is freakin' awesome. FREAKIN' AWESOME, I SAID!! *glomps him*

Ahem, anyway.

Severn is just okay. Bit of a cliché, but he pulls it off passably. Lord Nightshade (ruler of Nightshade) is pretty cool. And then we get to Kaylin Neya. Heh.

Basically, she's pretty darn stupid, but that makes her kind of endearing. I mean, everyone knows she's stupid, and I love how she's not one of the big shots at Hawk HQ. She's lowest of the low, always late, never proper, and never really knows what's going on. She failed pretty much every class in Hawk school, which gives everyone else the excuse to explain things to the reader.

Though sometimes, they don't explain. She'll say something stupid, and the other people will look at each other and go "You didn't tell her?" "Of course not." "Okay, let's leave it that way." and they'll just carry on with their lives. It gives the impression that Michelle Sagara hasn't really figured out the details yet.

Like I said, rough draft.

There are like, five more books in the Elantra series, so maybe she'll get around to explaining a few things. I'm hoping her writing gets better too. The second book is called Cast In Courtlight, which sounds absolutely stupid, but by "Court" they mean the Barrani High Court, so maybe it'll cool after all (the Barrani are one of the high races, along with the humans and Dragons and... other people I can't remember). Although with her stupidity, I don't see how Kaylin would last two seconds in a Court, much less a Barrani one.

--Persy

You might like this if you: like fantasy worlds like Poison Study (Maria V. Snyder) or Graceling (Kristin Cashore); are looking for a fantasy book that's not very typical; have a fondness for unattractive covers (I really don't like this cover, I'm sorry); if you like awesome Dragon people (WE LOVE YOU, TIAMARIS); or if you have a fondness for vampires, dragons, or zombies and want to read every single book that so much as mentions them.

Persy -- I Am Here! Vol. 1 by Ema Toyama

I have this unwritten rule for myself that I don't review manga or graphic novels, because I can't help but feel like I'm not qualified. But why shouldn't I be? I'm going to DO IT! (in other words, I don't feel like putting the effort into writing an actually coherent review about a book, and would rather gush incoherently about something else).

Hikage Sumino is not just an introvert, and she's not even all that shy. She's just invisible. She often gets counted off as absent because the teachers don't notice her, and no one ever gets her name right. She's okay with it, though, because she has her internert friends, "Black Rabbit" and "Mega Pig," that always comment on her blog.

But then one day, one of the most popular guys at school talks to her -- and knows her name! Realizing her chance, Sumino begins to try and step out of the shade into the sunlight, but it's not as easy as it sounds.

I picked this up on a complete whim (wanna know the full story? Watch the video). After flipping through it and falling in love with the artwork, I bought it, took it home, and tried to resist the temptation to read it immediately. I got one or two lessons of geometry done before I gave in and read all 404 pages. I am so glad I picked it up, because I think it's going to become one of my favorites.

It's the cutest thing ever (except maybe The One And Only Ivan), with absolutely beautiful art. That's one of my main requirements for a good manga (or anime, for that matter): lovely artwork. I'm not a huge fan of the goofy style; I like prettiness. And that's one thing I Am Here! has.

Also, the characters themselves are adorable. Sumino can be painfully shy without being painfully annoying, and I can even sympathize with her and cheer her on. Black Rabbit and Mega Pig are also fun and each have a distinctive voice, and Teru and Hinata (the two popular boys) are both pretty cool and pretty darn cute.

I Am Here! may not be the most original school life manga, but it's definitely got something, and I'm definitely hooked to it (now I just need to find the second volume for cheaper than eighteen dollars, 'cause that's ridiculous).

--Persy

You might like this if you: like shoujo, school life manga or anime; like pretty art or cute characters; need an uplifting little story to cheer you up or keep you going; or if you're invisible and need a few pointers (though you're on your own for the whole getting-the-popular-guy-to-talk-to-you-first thing).



Persy -- Life As We Knew It by Susan Beth Pfeffer

Everyone knew the meteor was coming and it wasn't a big deal. Everyone left their houses to watch it strike the moon. Some were scared, some excited, and some didn't care. But then the unexpected happens. The moon is knocked closer to the Earth, and Hell breaks loose -- slowly.

Tsunamis sweep the globe due to the tidal change, power frequently goes out, and that's just the beginning. Hundreds die in just moments. Others take a year to flicker out of existence.

During all this, Miranda, a teenager in Pennsylvania, is faithfully keeping a diary, starting a few days before the collision and continuing it on throughout the apocalypse. She takes us through months and months of survival along with her family: Mom, Jonny, Matt, Dad, Lisa (stepmother), Peter (Mom's boyfriend), and Mrs. Nesbitt (next-door neighbor).

I'm kind of hesitant to review this right now, because I JUST finished it a few hours ago, but I really want to. So I hope you're all prepared for some scattered and disconnected thoughts.

The beginning is really dodgy. I almost put it down countless times, but for some reason I kept on reading. When I was about halfway through, it started to get really good and really hard to put down.

At first, Miranda is the dullest person ever. She's not really annoying, and she's miserable, but she has some pretty good reasons, so I don't mind that so much. She just seems like a really boring person. And she never gets exactly interesting, but she grows so much and when I set the book down, it took me a minute to connect end Miranda with beginning Miranda. And yet, she's still the same character.

None of the characters are really likeable, but they aren't meant to be. It's a very realistic book, which means none of the characters are mind-blowingly awesome. That's just something you have to get over, but the suspense makes it easier.

And the ending is really good. I don't want to give anything away, so... I really can't say much, but I'm impressed with Susan Beth Pfeffer's ability to write a good, final ending. And yet, it's not final final. If you know what I mean.

The only thing that really really irritates me (besides the beginning) is the scene where they burn hair. Burning hair produces an awful smell. Geez.

The second book in the Last Survivors series,The Dead And The Gone, is about someone completely different going through the same disaster, so I'm looking forward to it. Even though I grew to almost enjoy Miranda, I'm glad we're done with her.

In short, I'd strongly recommend Life As We Knew It, but it requires some persistence in order to get past the beginning and into the good stuff.

--Persy

You might like this if you: like survival/apocalyptic novels; enjoy books like Unwind (Neal Shusterman, http://persyandarty.blogspot.com/2010/09/persy-unwind-by-neal-shusterman.html) or Gone (Michael Grant); like beautiful moon covers; or if you're worried about the moon and want a guide on how to survive the oncoming apocalypse.

Persy -- Interview With The Vampire

I only just got around to reading the great gothic vampire classic, Interview With The Vampire by the renowned Anne Rice. I know, for someone who says she likes real vampires, you'd think I'd have gotten to Anne Rice earlier, but oh well. I finally read it.

One night in modern America (?), Louis the vampire meets with a young reporter to tell his life story, which is pretty long and action-packed. It starts centuries ago, when Louis first came to America from France and was turned into a vampire by Lestat. And... well, Louis's story spans across centuries, mostly involving himself and Lestat along with a few other vampires that come and go, namely Claudia and Armand. Throughout it all, you get glimpses of the future during scenes when Louis, mysteriously alone, interacts with his human interviewer.

I'm going to be entirely honest here. I didn't like it.

I'm sorry, but it was just... geez. Anne Rice's writing is gorgeous, but... I hated all the characters. From the beginning, I really wanted Louis to just kill Lestat and then throw himself into the sunlight so they'd all be put out of their dreadful misery. That's pretty much the basis of the entire book: misery. Immortal misery. Misery spanning centuries and centuries. Misery in America, misery in Europe. Misery with one person, misery with a whole group of people.

MIIIISEEEEEERY!!!!!

Basically, Louis's a sap and Lestat is a jerk. Claudia's insane, but that's not her fault, so mostly I just feel sorry for her. Armand's actually all right, but he's not in much and is also in a miserable situation... BECAUSE OF LOUIS AND LESTAT.

So basically, I'm right back at the beginning. Lestat and Louis should both just die.

I am going to read some later novels by Anne Rice, because her writing is pretty good, but Interview With The Vampire was just a huge disappointment.

--Persy

You might like this if you: like gothic vampiric stuff; don't read books looking for cool characters; just want to say you've read it; or if you find yourself in an incredible state of misery and for some reason want to read about other people in misery.

Wednesday Scrolls - Belated January Review

January already feels like fifteen years ago, but here am I, Persy, to tell you about the best and worst of the first month of 2012! In Janury, I read a total of 22 books and 3726 pages! I'm definitely off to a good start (I'm not going to say anything about February, though...

Best January Book: I Want My Hat Back written and illustrated by Jon Klassen. Go read this book. Right now. It'll take you five seconds.

Honorable Mention: Ender's Game by Orson Scott Card and Marco's Millions by William Sleator (out of 22 books, of course I'm going to have multiple honorable mentions).
Worst January Book: What Happens In Vegas, Dies In Vegas by Mark Everett Stone. All the characters were the same, and...need I really get into the completely bizarre time travel?

Dishonorable Mention: Bitten by Kelley Armstrong. Stay far away. I'm getting my wisdom teeth plus four premolars surgically removed tomorrow, so stay tuned for a probably late and senseless review by me this weekend.

--Persy

Konnichiwa, everyone! Arty at your service. This January, I read 20 books, three of which were manga.

Best January Book: The Kings of Clonmel by John Flanagan, the eighth Ranger's Apprentice book. RA is like How To Train Your Dragon for me... only ten times worse. I'm an addict.

Honorable Mention: Inheritance by Christopher Paolini (don't look at me like that - I like the books, okay?) and Quicksilver by Stephanie Spinner.

Worst January Book: Behind The Gates by Eva Gray, the first Tomorrow Girls book. The Hunger Games for tweens. Just... don't. Unless you're having trouble sleeping.

Dishonorable Mention: I... really don't have any other books that I particularly disliked. January was a rather lukewarm month.

And that was my literary January. (Whoa, that almost rhymes. Almost.) Next Wednesday I hope to have another Scrolls up, but we know how that goes. Sayonara!

-Arty

Persy -- Marco's Millions by William Sleator

We've all been in that sticky situation where you find something creepy in your basement. We've all experienced that terror and uncertainty, but Lilly's got something we don't. Her brave older brother, Marco.

Lilly's always been a bit strange. She...knows things. Oh, you're missing a sock? You dropped it behind your bed. Where's Marco? He went for a walk in the park. What's the secret you've been hiding from everyone? Lily knows. But Lilly's very timid and shy, so when she finds the strange glowing lights on the wall in the basement, she fetches her brother Marco.

Marco can't see the lights, but when he reaches out (under Lilly's instruction), his hands go right through the wall! It is in fact a portal to another world, a strange and frightening one full of strange and frightening creatures...who want Lilly.

As things unfold, it turns out that the other world is in terrible danger, danger that could also affect Earth. So Lilly and Marco set out to solve the problem, but with a vast time difference between the two worlds (five minutes in the alien world is an entire afternoon on Earth), will they be able to save the universe in time?

William Sleator is, without a doubt, one of the greatest authors of all time. He's the man who brought us Interstellar Pig and the horrifying House of Stairs. And despite a slow beginning, Marco's Millions is another amazing piece of literature.

While it seems like something for a younger audience, it gets so intense at the end that I really couldn't put it down all afternoon. The characters may be a bit two-dimensional, but there's so much action going on that anything more about the characters would just clutter up the book. Mr. Sleator knows when to focus on the plot.

And don't get me started on time travel. It's a dangerous and tragic thing, and absolutely awesome when in the right hands. And let me tell you, Mr. Sleator definitely owns a good pair. While it is a bit awkward when he suddenly starts throwing in heavier scientific terms (singularity, complex time difference equations), it's very easy to get past. Only for a moment do you stop and go, "Wait, what?"

This is actually a prequel to Mr. Sleator's earlier novel, The Boxes, which is quite good, but not nearly as good as "Marco". Nevertheless, "Marco" holds a certain hint of awesome that only comes into effect if you've already read The Boxes, so I'd recommend reading that first if you can get your hands on both books.

I'm also very sad to report that William Sleator died last year on August 3rd in Thailand (apparently he had a house there). He will be sorely missed.

--Persy

You might like this if you: like time travel; like other William Sleator novels; like books like Last Stop; are a fan of scifi, but not the hard stuff; or if you have a dark and scary basement.